My magic bullet addiction — week 35

The biggest detriment I face in my quest to shed half of me is what happens when I think I’m going to start a new program, or submit to a pretty drastic solution. Those are moments in which I think, “The solution is just a tomorrow away, so today I’m living it up.”

I had it right earlier in this process when I said victory in this comes from the moment-to-moment decisions I make.

And yet, time after time the biggest addiction I have besides food is to the magic bullet that will kill it.

When I began this process I had a long, online conversation with a friend who asked why weight-loss surgery was out of the question. My response then was that it isn’t, but if I could do this without it, then I wanted to. While the surgery does create outstanding results, it is still a tough road to take. My stock answer for years has been that those who get the surgery have to make dramatic lifestyle changes. I’d rather make the changes without the surgery.

It gets tempting, though, and it was this last week. I saw a picture of a friend of ours side by side with one from a year ago. The difference was remarkable. So remarkable, in fact, that I seriously wondered, after 34 weeks of stumbling on a plan I thought would be that magic bullet, whether surgery was my best bet. The second result of that thought process was me tricking my mind into believing a massive change was coming. When that happens I overeat. I did, and I packed on a bunch of pounds. My overall weight loss right now is about 15 pounds, where it had been as much as 27.

The answer came at about 8 p.m. Sunday. I was leaving work and thought about getting a Coke. I considered how it would really make me feel and what impact it would have on my body and decided against it.

That, more than anything I can do, will be what ultimately creates success for me. Making moment by moment decisions on what I have to keep reminding myself is a journey is what will result in one day me jumping on a scale or looking in a mirror or trying on clothing and saying, “I hit my goal.” That’s the truth whether I do it through a structured program, a surgery or by just living better. So right now I’m focusing on living better.

I made progress when I decided against that Coke.